Southern Mom Loves: Mommy Storytime: Babies Don't Grow in Butts

Mommy Storytime: Babies Don't Grow in Butts

Friday, April 8, 2016

My daughter is ridiculously funny, and not always on purpose. The best stories happen when she is being: A. Curious, B. Hyper, C. Sneaky, or D. Goofy. This one is a full-on A.

This is a story that is told and retold in our family, and also in our friend's families, and sometimes just to anyone who will listen to my BIL because he thinks this is hilarious. Enjoy my discomfort.

One summer when my daughter was 4, I had driven into Memphis with the kids to spend the day at the zoo. It was super-hot and by the time they closed, we were sweaty and cotton-candy-sticky, but also damp from the misting fans they set out to cool people off (we may have spent an excessive amount of time playing in those), so we were pretty gross.

By the time we got home, it was right at the kid's bedtimes. We have 2 showers, so my son jumped in one and my daughter and I jumped in the other.

I bathed my daughter and set her down with some toys in the back of the shower so I could wash my hair. Then I hear, "Mommy, why is your belly so big?" O_O

After a very. long. pause, I answered, "Well, I grew you and your brother in my belly. You both got very big, and after you were born, my belly went back down, but not all of the way." I thought I handled that pretty well, so I turned around to finish rinsing my hair.

She sat and thought about it for about 5 full seconds before asking dead seriously, "Well, what did you have in your butt?"

After assuring her that babies don't grow in butts, and laughing through the rest of the shower, I had to call my husband at work to tell him this story. He then called everyone he has ever known. I still get friends telling me they tell this story to random people all the time. Thanks, guys.

Do you have any funny kid stories? What was your most embarrassing moment? I love to read your comments!

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